New Directions

This is a blog I posted on my myspace page a few days ago that I wanted to share here as well.


The Ride:Well Tour has finished up, at least the biking part has anyway. But what we started is only beginning.

When we finished up a couple weeks ago, I had a hard time of it. The ride was one of the most transforming experiences of my life and the people that I rode with had become some of my closest friends. I entered into community in ways I had never experienced before and, for the first time, community was not a burden or something to deal with, but something I needed. I need the struggles, the conflicts, the collisions of ideas and personalities. I used to only want the easy things of community. Mainly I wanted someone to carry my burdens and move me in the right directions. I walked away from the Ride:Well Tour with a more complete picture of myself as an individual created by God for a purpose, and a willingness, even an understanding of my need, to work that out amongst other people. Even people who are different than me. I miss the Ride:Well team a lot.

So the Tour ended and I was faced with this challenge every day, sometimes moment to moment. It was the challenge to let my heart fall back into believing in my isolation and perpetual futility or to move forward with the new knowledge of who I am. I was not sure I would be able to do it apart from the folks I had grown so close to over the previous 7 weeks. What I have found is that by some move of Grace beyond myself, I am unable not to move forward. The community I was with, remains with me and compels me to move forward into the areas I have feared for a long time. Music. Art. Relationship.

So what am I doing about it all? I am looking for a new place to live in Nashville. One that is close to community. A place that also gives me the room I need to be creative. I started booking shows for the Fall yesterday. So far I have two potential dates. I am considering starting up a graphic design/art business. I have some ideas for a website that I won't say too much about now. And we are brainstorming some ideas for the possibility of Ride:Well 2009.

I am excited about the changes that are coming around in my life. For the first time I actually believe that what I say and do might do some good in people's lives. I am stepping out and taking some chances. And I am carrying the love of my friends and my God with me as I go. We will see what comes of it. My expectations for myself have always been high but, for maybe the first time, that doesn't worry me.